Archived News starting from 08-30-2008 and earlier
BlogApparently the ride in Mary Todd's Lincoln to see
Tropic Thunder was enough to excite
Excelcier into a
state of pure energy. The
Gnome Cam caught him just before the transformation was complete. Now you have someone to blame if your computer randomly starts playing Rush. I just hope this means he can fix my Wii sensor bar faster.
After my
initial upgrade yielded extra hardware, the
motherboard hand-me-down upgrades were eventually applied to my
media center and now my
main server. The obvious reason for the round of upgrades is because I'm obsessive
compulsive and love torturing myself with multiple operating system reloads. While that was the primary reason,
the slow photo thumbnail generation on
Cougarfest.com was another one that seems to
have been solved (it just happened to be the same reason for my
last upgrade
as well). While I would have been tickled pink with a 64-bit server, I'm stuck with a 32-bit flavor until a 64-bit ODBC driver for
Microsoft Access becomes available, or I join 1996 and upgrayyed all my Access DBs to SQL.
| Old System |
|
New System |
| Processor: | Athlon XP 3200+ (2.19Ghz) |
|
Processor: | Opteron 180 X2 (2.41Ghz) |
| Memory: | 1024 MB |
|
Memory: | 3072 MB |
| Mainboard: | nForce2 Ultra 400 |
|
Mainboard: | nForce4 MCP |
A conquest lease deal ending this month that pays for 2 months of your existing lease prompted Lisa to strike on a new
2009 Lincoln MKZ. I repeated many times what you're already thinking, but she was determined to get the MKZ instead of the more practical (and almost half-price)
Fusion, which is essentially the same car. I even broke the payments down into happy faced Lisas and frowney faced Lisas, but she chose the frowney faced higher payment every time. Defeated by the princess complex yet again, I accepted her fate and promptly delved into her
Sync system. After pairing her phone and programming her garage door opener, I allowed her to leave the dealer lot under the condition that I could connect her iPod once I got home. The transitive property now allows me to say I own a Lincoln, without the hassle of having to pay for it.
The one major complaint I have about the Wii is it's short 11' sensor bar wire. It works great for people using their Wiis next to their TV, but not when the Wii is 40' away from where you're projecting it. There are plenty of wireless bars available, but they require batteries and a button push every time you want to use it. I also found a 6' extension cable but wasn't in the mood to buy 5 of them. That left modifying it, and after reading
this thread I was pretty confident I could do it. Reality soon kicked in when the comment about the thin wires turned out to be an understatement. I would have no reservations about calling these wires thinner than human hairs. Why this cable had to be so cheaply made I'll never know, but my attempts at connecting it to a length of speaker wire was a horrendous failure. A
wireless solution was quickly implemented, with the original sensor bar now trash unless I can sucker
Excelcier into attempting the connections. The wireless one also beeps like a microwave once the timer is about to run out, so I plan on trashing it next during my attempt to cut the speaker wire.
To celebrate the de-bachelorizing of Jaird, it was decided a Rock Band playoff would be held in my basement, which turned into a mix of Rock Band, "Meet the Spartans," Wii Sports and Wii Fit. The Wii Fit told Jaird and I that we were overweight, but fortunately Keith and Chase, who were "normal" were able to convince us we were actually just "solidly built" and kept us from breaking into tears. We're both
joining the lawsuit any ways, and plan to complain loudly in public places about it while denying we're at all overweight. A drive to Grand Rapids rewarded us with a rainy car cruise, followed by an intoxication party and more sleep depravation. While no strippers were involved, there were plenty of drunk chicks to scare with abnormally large slugs that made up for it.
After Lisa experienced Wii Fit at
the Kelleys, she demanded we also obtain one. Unfortunately almost 2 years after the Wii's introduction, smart marketing supply shortages meant there were still no deals to be had on it. After forking over the full $250 for the Wii, I felt slightly better saving $10 off the new MSRP of $99 for a used Wii Fit on eBay, with bonus stranger foot juice. Unlike the
last time I got a Wii, this one won't be moving to Arizona suddenly. It may end up on eBay, however, if Lisa doesn't stick to her promised
weekly usage of the system. I also get to count it as her Christmas present, so the $340 ends up well spent in the end. Now that I've caught up to 2006, please justify my existance by adding me as your Wii friend, as you no doubt already obtained one potentially years ago. You can also add some
random creepy furries while you're at it.
AtomicInternet Wii Console ID: 5101 6554 8268 7487
Our little
Enorym (also known as
MYRN!) got all growed up today at his
wedding to Loida, the one woman in the world who can truly appreciate all that is Enorym. I was the candle holder, which meant I had to contain a candle in an orifice on my person until the proper time came in the wedding to light the candles that would light the unity candle. It all went off without a hitch at the
rehearsal, but when the actual
wedding came around my fellow candle holder and I decided we would light the unity candle for them. Fortunately George Takei, the minister for the ceremony, was quick to correct us before we accidentally unified each other instead of Enorym and Loida. Disaster averted, and wedding completed, we proceeded to get intoxicated and dance homo erotically with Myrn before coming to the realization that it was all over, and we had to leave. Several awkward man-hugs later we were back in Michigan wondering how only a week passed when the entire edventure felt like a month.
San Francisco was the
wedding destination so we made sure to visit Lombard street, Pier 39,
Alcatraz and the
Golden Gate Bridge. During the visit, I had a pleasant run in with a cat lady who swore up and down that I hit her car despite the fact there was no mark on her truck. Fortunately a witness behind us also noticed she was a crazy cat lady and gave me her card so we could get on with our day, which consisted of a trip to
Muir Woods. During our unplanned 5-mile hike through the woods, we encountered some Ewoks that seemed very friendly until they tried to hump our legs, at which point we quickly moved on to Muir Beach where
Brian became intimately familiar with the local deceased sea life. A trip to Twin Peaks for a view of the city was blocked due to fog, which lead to a permanently traumatizing visit to
Castro street, which activated my survival mode and required me to seek out the safety of drug stores. It did however assist with a bowel movement later that evening.
Phase two of the bachelor party was a trip to
Hoover Dam and Grand Canyon. Our attempts to locate the
Allspark at the dam were unsuccessful, but we did manage to do some time travelling between Nevada and Arizona, despite the fact that most of Arizona doesn't observe daylight savings time. In addition to deflowering their Hoover dam and Grand Canyon virginity, we also made a stop at In and Out Burger which left
Lisa,
Stavos and Candy very sore from all the new experiences. The entire bachelor party agreed the grand canyon was too massive to fully comprehend, with our narrow eyes unable to process depth on such a scale. We took excessive photos anyways in a useless attempt to capture it.
A short break between bachelor party phases allowed for a
night in Vegas
where Lisa,
Stavos and Candy had their Vegas virgin deflowering. Lisa and I both won less than $20 which put us in the self-classified category of high rollers, and we spent accordingly. The
bachelor, meanwhile, went full saucer-eyes over the soon-to-be-closed
Star Trek Experience, which we then "experienced" as many times as we could before it closed for the night. A confusion over the words Plaza and Palazzo resulted in a failed rendezvous with the women, but deposited us in old Vegas for a proper evening wrapup.
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