Archived News starting from 04-11-2008 and earlier
Blog
After Lisa completed the required
Gnome Cam dance for Phantom of the Opera tickets, it was off to bid farewell to the Morlock down the street. His emancipation from the cursed state of Michigan is a triumph, one that I'm extremely jealous of. His celebration was filled with gay jokes, liquor, and awkward man hugs, all appropriate for the Morlock. I also made it a point to introduce him to my new neighbors, since it was the first and last time they would ever see him, and therefore hilarious. Good luck in AZ Morlock, I hope to one day join you in the land of eternal sunshine and anti-snow. Enjoy the recycled anti-morlock symbol which now represents goodbye morlock.
Wanting to see my now famous and admired
chromed Xbox 360 with their own eyes,
Stavos and Tammy came over to witness the
Gizmodo mandated purchase, along with a similarly senseless purchase of the
racing wheel. As usual,
shenanigans ensued with many
flattering photos of
Stavos and
Tammy. As you can see we learned mounting the wheel to a table was much more effective than the lap/beanbag combo. Now to program a bus driving simulator with
XNA and make millions!
A few months ago "
Captain Georges Ice Cream" shop opened up just north of my house. I was fascinated by it's creepy sign that screamed "I'm a pedophile, send me your children!" To make it even more creepy, a month ago they appended the sign to also include middle eastern food. So now there's a child molester serving ice cream and middle eastern food to kids. I'm not sure how the middle eastern food fits into the equation, but ice cream and kids are a natural match. I'm counting the days till little Jimmy tells his parents about the "bad touch" and it shuts down for good. Until then, I'll claim my theory is fact without even entering the store to further investigate.
My 15 year old octagon picnic table that rotted apart last year was sacrificed to the bonfire gods for the first fire of the season.
Keith and
Lindsay both wept as our shared memories of it rotting in back of his Redford house went up in flames along with the table. The
new neighbors also attended, witnessing Lisas
seizure laugh for the first time, possibly scaring them away for good. I also completed
Ron's long anticipated folding chair swap for Keiths coveted Cougar chairs.
In case you missed the latest South Park episode,
Major Boobage, it's a tribute to the 80's cartoon
Heavy Metal, which has the same animation style as
Aeon Flux. Kenny trips out on cat spray (best to just
watch it than have me try to explain it) and enters the Heavy Metal world with Don Felders
"Takin a Ride" playing in the background. The sequences are awesome, but more importantly the song gets stuck in your head. So much so that I'm now looping it at work continuously. I'm hoping to burn out on it by the end of the week, but until then welcome to my madness.
My quest to camp out at Sonic Southgate for opening day continues, and today I decided to check up on the building progress. After driving to what I pinpointed as the
exact location of the future Sonic, I took
various photos of the
lot including a
building closeup and
wide shot. I'm guessing late April at this point, since the parking lot hasn't been poured and it looks like utilities aren't even hooked up yet. Couldn't find anything to help find a contact for the company building it, but seeing the sign and actual building definitely got me all hot and bothered.
Easter included a stop at the flatlanders to celebrate the anniversary of the spawn of Melanie and Jaird. I of course sent them
an e-card to congratulate them, and loaned out Lisa for some
last minute wrapping. Sunday breakfast yielded a
jellybean zygote Easter miracle, which Lisa was
very excited to witness.
My obsession with
Sonic dates back to when I helped Joseph move down to Florida in 2002. There, for the first time, I sampled the experience and was so excited I had to get a photo with
one of the waitresses, who tolerated me quite well. Unfortunately, the closest Sonic to Michigan is over 8 hours away in Indiana, which meant the constant commercials served only to taunt me the past 6 years. My Sonic visits were limited to vacations, that is until today when I learned that Sonic is
coming to southgate! I plan to find out the actual opening date in April and camp outside that morning in celebration of the fact that it will soon only be an hour away from me.
After dedicating 46 hours of my life to
Call of Duty 4, I finally joined the rest of my friends at the
maximum rank of commander. Not a very
exciting accomplishment, but at least I have something to show for it. After 250 hours of Battlefield 2142 I'm still
4 ranks away and Frontlines only teases me with
screenshots, so it was nice to finally get a warm feeling of accomplishment. With today reaching 60 degrees, I'll soon hopefully be free of my FPS prison.
Yesterday the Morlock came over for a redneck bumper repair. The technique involves placing a jack under a rear-ended truck bumper and jumping up and down in the cargo bed, forcing the bumper back into it's proper position. In addition to beating their chest and glaring with glowing eyes, jumping menacingly is a specialty of the Morlock, so the repair was expertly executed.
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