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Today I got my first look at the parasite living inside Lisa. The ultrasound tech tried to convince me it was a normal healthy human, but I saw the spine and I know an alien larva when I see one. Here you can see the head, eyes and nose in profile which is clearly an alien head. I don't remember a face sucker ever latching onto Lisa, but somehow it deposited the egg when I had my guard down. I'm not sure how much time she has, so I'm trying to make her comfortable for as long as she has left. I've got a quick start flamethrower and plenty of fuel so I'm prepared. And in case you're wondering,
here is how babby form.
Today is the day
Enorym predicted aliens would land and make themselves known. Instead, a
mega patch landed for my web server. Considering the aliens may make themselves known on the internets and facesbook instead of IRL, I thought it wise to patch up and prepare. Know this alien energy spheres: you can't get into my web server and harness the collective minds of humanity.
The ever helpful Redford Building and Safety Engineering department decided I haven't given them enough money, and sent a nice letter to ask for more. This time the random number generator decided I
owe $165 for a rental inspection, quite an increase from the $45 I paid last time. Happy to single handedly solve the budget crisis in this great township, I sent along a special note letting them know just how excited I am to pay for this ridiculous required service to the community. Now I just need to figure out how to pull off the most bizarre rental house condition this guy has ever seen.
The
Morlock recently purchased a sailing yacht, of which I am the official tow vehicle. As such, Lisa and I are included on Morlock boat outings. My initial 15 minute cruise past sugar island during the purchase was epic, but short. Today we entertained everyone at Kensington by launching a sailboat in 50 degree weather, and learning the pleasure of launching/retrieving said boat in high wind. Fortunately the Morlock paid attention in sailing school and knew how to rig up the boat properly,
and after some fighting with the engine our adventure began. While visions of the keel hitting bottom and the boat exploding into flames plagued me for the first 15 minutes, the cool sound of
Christopher Cross soothed me into a more relaxed mood and I was able to play Leonardo DiCaprio at the front of the boat. Aside from some horrendous swaying above 50mph, the tow was uneventful.
The flatlanders stopped by today for a visit, and while Lisa and Melanie went shopping Jaird and I played the unbloggable device connected to my Xbox. While I had already become bored with the 3 games available, Jaird found various different game modes for them that got me interested again. That or my urge to jump around like a jackass had been unfulfilled for too long.
My GeForce 8800GT has served me well for
almost 3 years, but a
recent deal on a GTX 460 combined with it's position as number 8 on the
GPU performance rating (just below a $400 card) forced my hand. The upgrade
effectively doubled my GPU score, confirming the belief that the GTX 460 is the new 8800 GT in terms of bang for your buck. Windows 7 also seems to appreciate the new card as my
graphics rating has gone up
significantly. My peer pressure campaign at work successufully got everyone on my team to upgrade as well, making the GTX 460 the new hotness.
If you want to fit in with the cool kids, it's time to make the switch.
Today my Cougar met it’s replacement: the 2011 Ford Focus (sans turbo). While I expected a fight, or at least some jealous backfiring, the meeting
went well with both vehicles learning to respect one another.
Ron's acquisition of the test vehicle allowed us to fully appreciate the quantum leap in OEM techno gadgetry 11 years of automotive progress had to offer. We thoroughly violated every feature we could think of, missing the
active park assist feature entirely (which it was equipped with). Despite missing the ultimate automated feature, I’m now quite happy with my future purchase.
Like the
Sacculina, Lisas parasite has taken over control of her desires. This weekend it demanded she visit the
zoo and Cedar Point. Coincidence those are two kid-favorite locations you ask? Proof I say. After my drive home as a sleeping zombie, the parasite again demanded a trip to the
apple orchard and Renaissance fair, with the last visit including Robbie who seems to have successfully frightened loose control of Lisa, who once again desires only to watch TV and sleep.
Less than a month after my
prediction, it would appear the saga of the gay neighbors has finally come to a close. This morning Robbie alerted me he was awoken by breaking glass and that the "head of the court" was in process of clearing out their house. After being told it was “none of his concern” Robbie promptly became belligerent, then reasonable and eventually learned they found drugs and completely trashed the inside of the house. I came home to find an eviction notice on their door with the house completely empty. You can watch the unfolding drama on the
GnomeCam and hope with me that a really cool neighbor will buy the house.
When you own an 11 year old car and the forecast calls for rain, driving 2 hours to a campsite just seems right. Strangely enough, 9 other owners of 11 year old cars came to the same conclusion; so we decided to mix some alcohol and shenanigans to
complement our madness. After surviving a crazed cokehead and violating every object we could find in the vicinity, we enjoyed a final night of constant rain to bid us farewell.
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Today I got my first look at the parasite living inside Lisa. The ultrasound tech tried to convince me it was a normal healthy human, but I saw the spine and I know an alien larva when I see one. Here you can see the head, eyes and nose in profile which is clearly an alien head. I don't remember a face sucker ever latching onto Lisa, but somehow it deposited the egg when I had my guard down. I'm not sure how much time she has, so I'm trying to make her comfortable for as long as she has left. I've got a quick start flamethrower and plenty of fuel so I'm prepared. And in case you're wondering, here is how babby form.
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