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Our trip to Los Angeles began with a bird splat shortly after takeoff. Upon hearing a loud thud and Myrns "Oh my God" klaxon you can clearly see the aftermath of a flock of seagulls (birds, not the 80s band) hitting the wing, less than 50ft from the engine. Fortunately we were on an Airbus A320 which means our outcome would have been identical to the Hudson crash, complete with New Yorkers appearing in the water with us. After an altercation with a prada sunglasses wearing wife abuser, we were on our way to Beverly Hills so we could talk like Cameron from Ferris Buellers Day Off and take photos of all the rich houses that lost 50% of their value. A stop at Carneys Express resulted in Myrn testing the rigidity of the rental car frame as he bottomed out on the curb. All drivers owning $80,000+ vehicles in the immediate area (every car but ours) snubbed their noses in disapproval. The 78 degree weather demanded a trip to the beach, so after a short cruise on Mulholland drive we obliged in Malibu where I cursed my decision not to include shorts in my wardrobe. Our final destination was Slappy and his wife/fiance/girlfriend where we learned he is deathly afraid of crossing the street, and that Weinderschnitzel makes a pretty good Sea Dog (so named because it plops undigested in the toilet). A twisty and nautious trip into the mountains yielded a great view of Los Angeles where Myrn once again regaled the tale of the battle of L.A.AtomicInternet Archived News
AtomicInternet Archived News
Archived News starting from 02-28-2009 and earlier
Our trip to Los Angeles began with a bird splat shortly after takeoff. Upon hearing a loud thud and Myrns "Oh my God" klaxon you can clearly see the aftermath of a flock of seagulls (birds, not the 80s band) hitting the wing, less than 50ft from the engine. Fortunately we were on an Airbus A320 which means our outcome would have been identical to the Hudson crash, complete with New Yorkers appearing in the water with us. After an altercation with a prada sunglasses wearing wife abuser, we were on our way to Beverly Hills so we could talk like Cameron from Ferris Buellers Day Off and take photos of all the rich houses that lost 50% of their value. A stop at Carneys Express resulted in Myrn testing the rigidity of the rental car frame as he bottomed out on the curb. All drivers owning $80,000+ vehicles in the immediate area (every car but ours) snubbed their noses in disapproval. The 78 degree weather demanded a trip to the beach, so after a short cruise on Mulholland drive we obliged in Malibu where I cursed my decision not to include shorts in my wardrobe. Our final destination was Slappy and his wife/fiance/girlfriend where we learned he is deathly afraid of crossing the street, and that Weinderschnitzel makes a pretty good Sea Dog (so named because it plops undigested in the toilet). A twisty and nautious trip into the mountains yielded a great view of Los Angeles where Myrn once again regaled the tale of the battle of L.A.
My great California escape has begun! After being greeted by the Myrn, our first order of business was to get some In and Out in my belly. My favorite west coast fast food place did not disappoint, and we were off to a Tesla dealership. We confirmed I can't fit in the car and that electric cars are quiet. Having learned nothing, it was off to Frys where we were kicked out for taking photos. The only logical follow up is NASA Ames Research center, where we were shocked by free 3D glasses and free admission to their museum. The terrorists win once again as we were informed that since 9/11 tours of the base are not allowed. $2.50 astronaut ice cream was the only consolation we had. After picking up Loida, it was time to watch the sunset at an abandoned military fort turned bum preserve turned dump. But in California, even a dump is better than Michigan.
User Comments for 02-24-2009:
 | Umm.. no.. are you truly that bored?? AND BTW.. how friggen old is that pic? YOU HAVE HAIR THERE! ROFL Excelcier |
 | I don't see any resemblance. I'm going to call an EPIC FAIL on this post. Stavos |
| I just think Brad hit a whole new level of boredom in my opinion. He actually ran out of Blog content.. it's a depressing day in hell. Excelcier |
 | Actually, this was one of the people who MyHeritage said resembled Brad. And this was the morph they came up with... Funny, I'm a mix between Alice Cooper, George Clooney, and Capt Picard. :P E1 |
Today, Lisa provided an encounter perfectly encapsulated for sharing. Now you too can experience what life with Lisa is really like. She arrives home, greets me and asks "What are you drinking?" A beer I reply. "What kind of beer?" she asks as she looks for herself and takes a swig. "Ooo I don't like that beer, don't buy that anymore." She returns to the kitchen table. "Where did you get these girl scout cookies from?" "From work" I reply. "Who did you buy them from?" she asks. "Are you an officer on the board of girl scout cookie inspection?" I ask. "I don't like Samoas, why did you buy Samoas?" "because I like them" I replied. "Ugh, these are terrible, don't buy these anymore" Before I can ask why she's eating cookies she doesn't like, she drops the box on to the ground, spilling 4 onto the floor. I manage to stop her before she can stuff the dirty cookies back into the box. Your mileage may vary.
User Comments for 02-19-2009:
| LMAO thats awesome Stavos |
 | Typical wife simulator enorym |
 | Who doesn't like Samoas? Really? SERIOUSLY??? Mrs. Yoseph |
| What kind of beer was it? Not Cherry Wheat... Cause if she doesn't like Samoas OR Cherry Wheat, then I have to rethink my entire opinion of her. And I don't want to have to do that...
Oh, and remember your quotation marks. :) Mrs. Yoseph |
 | thinmints FTW R10T |
 | He forgot to mention that the SCUBA had just been run in the dining room and the floor was clean!!! Not to mention the 3 second rule! And the beer was ARCADIA something or other - terrible!! I like thinmints! :) poopy |
| the three or five second rule is False bacteria and germs attach to the fallen food instantly! and your a nurse....
http://www.snopes.com/food/tainted/dropped.asp Stavos |
| Mythbusters also proved it using bacteria cultures. The cleanest spot on your home is..... your toilet seat. R1OT |
| Swap roles, and you have my marriage. Brian |
| AW FUCK! You have a scooba?!?
/so jealous Brian |
 | Lay down the law! You're the man. averagejoe |
| Man talk about the most controversial blog ever! Stavos |
With the U.S. becoming more socialist every day, I thought it was a good time to review the various types of governments similar to socialism, which seem to be used interchangeably in the news. Those being: communism, fascism and totalitarianism. All 4 have the goal of levelling any class distinctions in favor of communal harmony, vs. the capitalist idea of each individual being able to attain whatever class level they are willing to work for. Buying a house you can't afford and then expecting the government to pay your mortgage is unquestionably socialism, which means we are making the change and should know the differences. I found a great summary of the differences, and then the ultimate simple comparison. Educate yourself and embrace change!
A botched change to my facebook profile turned into a short-lived social experiment. By claiming Lisa and I had ended our marriage, I ignited a fire of confusion and concern, all despite any confirmation other than a facebook notice. I was shocked to discover how much weight a social networking tool carries with my friends, and especially with Lisa who was more than slightly miffed about the change. Only after I re-married her on Facebook was she able to enjoy the humor.
User Comments for 02-17-2009:
| Yeah changing your listing status on Facebook is flirting with disaster. Watch Big Bang theory they proved this theory very well on the show. 902 comments now btw! Stavos |
| So how long from the status change did it take to receive the first response? R1OT |
 | Women are too sensitive. Estrogen must be a really crazy chemical! Tim |
 | They should warn you! I did the same thing. It took about 5 minutes for somebody I haven't talked to in 10+ years to see it and comment: "Single?! What happened?!" Duane |
It's been almost a year now since I finally got my Wallypower 118 and despite my best efforts, I've yet to find a proper theme song to play when piloting it around the caribbean. My wait is finally over thanks to Saturday Night Live and the "I'm on a boat" short. It's the perfect choice to make the various locals I encounter hate me even more.Stavos somehow managed to convince our wives to attend the Star Trek Exhibition at the Detroit Science Center for vagina day. While it initially seemed like a dream come true, 5 minutes into the exhibit we were quickly shown what a huge mistake it was. We ranked the visit at only 10% of the Las Vegas Experience we had come to use as the ultimate ranking for Star Trek themed exhibits. Even a few songs in Rock Band afterwards were unable to lift our crushed nerd spirits.
User Comments for 02-14-2009:
| It was indeed an epic fail. I’d enjoy passing a 1/4 kidney stone then to go back to the wooden star trek bridge full of people waiting in line to sit in a fake set that doesn't even resemble the original TV set. Way to do Detroit! Stavos |
| It was pretty ass... I agree.. shoulda seen my warning of financial waste before you went. Yeah Steve.. that was SUCH A corny Enterprise bridge. Talk about cheap. Excelcier |
| How much did it cost to attend this farce? R1OT |
| $19 Excelcier |
I'm sure you've seen it, it's like a photo of a spider bite gone wrong. You're curiosity overpowers your disgust and you simply can't look away. I'm talking, of course, about the most annoying internet ad banner ever created. Apparently it gets a lot of clicks, as just about every news site I visit has it in the rotation. My personal curiosity ended after the first view, and now I'm left wondering why it is people have such a strong urge to click on two of the nastiest midsection photos I've ever seen. The plus side for me is I lose my appetite every time I see it, so even though I'm not supporting them financially, it is helping to shrink my midsection.
User Comments for 02-13-2009:
| YES! I've been waiting for you to blog this for a month now! I'm surprised it hasn't been in the news yet. It's disturbing, annoying, and wrong thing I've ever seen next to the dancing moneys for a mortgage ad. People might be clicking on it but as for the ad itself it failed because as of right now I can't recall the company name, or the product they are selling. Stavos |
With record high temperatures for February during the last few days, a cold front was bound to stir up some air, and this morning it finally broke the 2005 wind record. Mind you, my weather station is the only true source of weather records in the metro detroit area, so this is a truly historical event. The last record was set when the original morlock inhabited my basement, I was deep into EVE online, and the economy still showed signs of life.
| Max Recorded Wind: | 34.9 MPH, 308° at 01:21 on 12 February |
User Comments for 02-12-2009:
| The anemometer is hypnotizing me and I can't look away, and for some strange reason I have the sudden urge to place $500 into your paypal account... Stavos |
| You are such a nerd. Love you! poopy |
 | MY WIFE LOVES ME AGAIN! The 6 month comment drought from her is over. AtomicInternet |
| Can you hold out for another 6 months though? Stavos |
| This blows.... R1OT |
Search 1550 News Articles
Comment Statistics| 1550 Total Articles | |
|---|---|
| 4361 Total Comments | |
Top 10 Commented Articles | |
| Your Xbox 360 Wants 802.11N | 45 |
| Jan LAN Dual Core Part 1 | 37 |
| Comment Party Great Success | 31 |
| Gravatars | 28 |
| Deflowering of a Morlock | 24 |
| Cougarfest 2008 | 23 |
| Plasma Lives! | 22 |
| Sonic Update | 21 |
| Verizon WinPhone7? | 20 |
| Gutting My Cougar | 19 |
Top 10 Commenters | |
| Stavos | 1346 |
| MorlockPrime | 552 |
| Excelcier | 487 |
| tim | 235 |
| R1OT | 195 |
| AtomicInternet | 166 |
| enorym | 164 |
| Senator Kelley | 131 |
| E1 | 114 |
| Duane | 94 |