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As you may have heard, NASA has had trouble getting the Spirit rover on Mars to send back data. Well it appears the jig is up and they are getting it back under control, so I think it's time for me to come clean. A few days ago I hacked into the rovers system and re-tasked it to explore the heat shield impact area. I have great faith in NASA, and it's clearly my favorite organization on the planet, but every joe blow knows an impact like the heat shield will throw up some serious debris. Why bother digging for alien fossils when you can just pick them out of the dust from the impact? After re-tasking and successfully exploring the impact zone (with mixed results) I had a hard time over-riding the commands from NASA and eventually shut down the rover to protect it from possible software corruption. The news media took this excursion of mine as a failure on the part of NASA, which is not surprising since the media is ignorant of everything not related to J-Lo. As a result, I've decided to let NASA do the driving from now on while I compile the results from my short jaunt across Mars. The rover will soon power back on and everything will be hunky dory again. J-Lo be damned.