AtomicInternet Archived News

The annual celebration of our nations independence from the british colonies was today. Instead of firing guns we now light fireworks, but the end result is the same: lots of noise. This girl was seen in northern Michigan celebrating. To the casual observer, she seems innocent but this incriminating photo clearly reveals her true nature: waterfoul stalker! Disguising fetal pigs as potential mates, this twisted person lures aroused waterfoul into range and fishes them out of the water. The dance of confusion temporarily disorients them before she turns them into squirrels. Look! There's only one left! Run while you still can!