AtomicInternet Archived News

With the realization that 3 week old Lucy had yet to experience a cider mill in Michigan, it was determined this must be remedied before I return to work. After explaining the activities and excitement she was about to experience, Lucy promptly agreed to the assessment by falling asleep and farting. A seasoned veteran of cider mills, Lila was of course ecstatic and sang "Old MacDonald" the entire way affirming she was in fact familiar with the petting farm and all the animals she would soon be meeting. On arrival, I spared no expense and loaded up with a dozen donuts and a gallon of cider. I was denied Lucy for both the cardboard cutout and hay wagon photo opportunities, proving yet again despite my genetic investment I am not authorized for any child I father until they are at least one year old. Full of sugar, we made the petting farm rounds and headed home for nap time.