AtomicInternet Archived News

With the arrival of Lila, Lisa is slowly transforming into a domestic housewife. She cleans so much now I'm convinced she's either a robot or alien doppelganger. While the cooking side has yet to kick in, her need to host parties has reached a new high. Inviting every random person on Facebook she could, a new years eve party was planned that was attended only by people I would have invited personally, proving Facebook event coordination still sucks balls. Those that did show were treated to her inability to provide food for less than 20 people and were prompted to stuff their face by the Lisa doppleganger repeatedly. Several got drunk and hilarious, several puppies urinated and shat on my floor, and Dick Clark was again thawed and reanimated for some zombie new year commentary. Also Senator Kelleys baby was allowed to stay up till midnight while my baby was not. I'm still upset about that.