Archived News starting from 07-04-2011 and earlier
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Lilas first July 4th was filled with pomp and circumstance. Up first was the Plymouth 4th of July parade where Lila experienced 90 degree temperatures and a
creepy pedophile spiderman. After politely declining spidermans offer of "spidey candy" we returned to my mothers for some late lunch. Robbie would not let the night pass without some serious explosions, the grande finale of which almost
blew us up.
After finding
this article I knew I would be upgrading my spare WP7 phone to the latest and greatest beta software. The
initial upgrade was like high school sex, knowing the parents were somewhere nearby but well worth the risk. 20 minutes with the upgraded phone and it was like your first college girl who does all kinds of crazy stuff the high school girl couldn't fathom. The high school chick was no longer an option, I had to risk bricking my primary phone. Fortunately no parents came crashing in to brick either phone and the unauthorized upgrade so far is working fantastic on both devices. Plan on keeping your distance from me for at least a week while I rant about the upgrade to anyone within earshot. Also my sex analogies might indicate some type of repressed homosexual urges so yet another reason to keep clear.
With the
Senator unable to discuss anything not related to his new Macbook, or the new thunderbolt port on it, my jealousy level was reaching an unacceptable level. My solution? A $400 used
ASUS G50V. Sadly, the 4 year old powerhouse laptop was now weaker than the mighty Radeon in his new Macbook which I
discovered after receiving it. Still, it's a gigantic leap from my previous laptop, which couldn't even play Starcraft 2. I ran a
3DMark hoping against hope that I might still prevail, sadly the numbers were not on my side.
After visiting every auto parts store on my street (there are 3) not one had a new muffler for my 2004 Ranger. At the last store, however, they recommended a "Muffler Band-Aid" that is essentially a fiberglass strip that's bonded with sodium silicate (liquid glass) to tolerate the heat from the muffler. After soaking the strip in the liquid glass and not wearing eye protection, I flung the patch over the hole in my muffler only to have a drop of the fluid land square in my left eye. I now know what it feels like to have cement form over your eyeball, and it's not pleasant. 10 minutes of flushing with water later, I was still in pain but could see enough to finish the patch. I've yet to actually test the patch job, but I'm sure any long-term eye damage will far outcost any savings I may have accomplished with it.
Less than a year and a half after
installing my powermeter, Google power; the primary reason I got the meter, is
being shut down. I can't imagine recording numbers in a spreadsheet takes a lot of resources, but apparently it was too much effort to keep alive. Fortunately my mysterious error on the
power page has fixed itself aside from the still busted gauges.
Lisa decided she had to act on her urge to make Tacos so I invited a bunch of random people who surprisingly all showed up save the Senator who mentioned something about not liking Lila. Tigerbomb and wife were compelled by guilt to visit with at least one holding the baby, while Whineyho was physically unable to hold the child (Schwartz was accommodating). I purchased pizza and alcohol for James and Cailen who arrived late to find all taco meat already consumed, sufficiently countering my bad host reputation. Lisa drank entirely too much and entertained those who stayed late.
By combining my neighbors recent love of absinthe and
Yoostar 2 we were able to create what I consider to be
genuine comedy. There's still a good chance it's not legitimately funny and the hallucinogenic properties of absinthe just left a permanent brain alteration, but it's worth a view. Eventually we decided two drunks were not enough and wisely included my infant daughter to create
Babyzilla and
baby candidate. Fortunately, no infants were physically hurt during filming, but the mental trauma I'm sure will be lifelong.
It began like any other trip to the toilet; the belt buckle was undone and the throne presentation was in mid swing. Like a skilled ski jumper, my belt clip slid off my unbuckled belt and bounced right into the crapper, phone tucked inside. It was pure instinct that allowed me to fetch it out before the event actually sunk in. By that time I had the cover off and the battery out. An evening snuggled in rice apparently did the trick as the phone amazingly works, with the bonus of a tie-dye screen and fogged up camera lens. I decided to go for the Asurion replacement anyway since they take more than enough money from me and both new features aren't yet on my wish list. Here's a
sweet photo effect I get to enjoy until the replacement arrives.
My
first father's day was an epic journey to Muskegon for some sailing and a cookout. Lisa was initially hesitant about my daughter boarding a sailboat, but after invoking father's day and downing 4 beers she was good to go. A few more beers later she was driving the boat and singing while I took advantage of the situation and posed Lila in various locations on the boat sober Lisa would have vetoed.
After seeing a
garage door opener deal my plan was to replace my primary opener with the deal, and move the old one to the barn, which has been sans-opener for over 3 years now. My neighbor had
other plans however, and wound up buying it off me for $100, leaving me with a $50 upgrade of an opener and a still barren barn.
Lila helped install the new one, which has battery backup and temperate sensors and lockouts and all these other fancy features I guess new openers come standard with now. Having verified the most important feature: opening the garage door, I'm now left with deciding if the barn is worth a brand new opener.
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