AtomicInternet Archived News

After deflowering Tammy's Hooters virginity, and a round of glow putt putt, the Kelleys joined Lisa and I for a showing of The Happening. The Kelleys gave it a thumbs down, and we gave it a thumbs up. The only thing to resolve such a disagreement was a trip to Microcenter and then Dave & Busters, where $50 got us 1900 tickets for a $10 gumball machine, but carnie economics always add up to fun in the end. On the way home I found cheap ($3.99 is cheap, HA!) gas and stopped in to find a broken card reader, necessitating a trip in. On entering the gas station, I was greeted with racial slurs being hurled back and forth, with one of the participants blocking the door on my way out. Moving him out of the way so I could exit the building prompted this classic photo taken by Stavos of the four short people arguing with me while Lisa tried to hold me back. Evidently Lisas efforts led them to believe I was some kind of a threat, as he suddenly offered to shake hands and told me he worked for the government. A strange end to our "Happening", which could only be followed up with suggestive videos of Lisa playing Wii Fit.