AtomicInternet Archived News

A few months ago "Captain Georges Ice Cream" shop opened up just north of my house. I was fascinated by it's creepy sign that screamed "I'm a pedophile, send me your children!" To make it even more creepy, a month ago they appended the sign to also include middle eastern food. So now there's a child molester serving ice cream and middle eastern food to kids. I'm not sure how the middle eastern food fits into the equation, but ice cream and kids are a natural match. I'm counting the days till little Jimmy tells his parents about the "bad touch" and it shuts down for good. Until then, I'll claim my theory is fact without even entering the store to further investigate.